Gestation...

Six weeks. Seems like so little, but a lot has formed in that amount of time. A heartbeat. Little nubbies for hands. A tail! Lol, I love you already - you're a Martian just like me. This constant hunger is a sign that you are truly my child; everyone knows I love to eat. You take as much time as you want in this tummy of mine, I could wait for years just to see your chunky little face shining up at me, but eight more months will do. It is an honor and a blessing to be your mother. 

I haven't told the world yet - because I want to see you for myself first. I won't pretend I'm not nervous, but I'm more excited than anything. If you knew where I've been in life, you'd understand why. One day when your older, my dear. Your daddy can't wait to see you, he's already buying a shiny new toy for your protection... 

Alas, I must sleep now. We've got to save our energy for next week, when you start moving those little limbs of yours. I'll be here for every step, every motion, every burp. Got blessed me when he made you... 

Where Have You Been?

"All my liyeeiiiffee!!" *Rihanna voice*

Just kidding. My sincerest apologies for the hiatus. Ironically considering that I didn't "work" for almost four months, I have been ridiculously busy! How about a quick recap of what Kimi's been dealing with lately? 

1. The Vadge Site:

I want to thank everyone for going so hard for me these past few months - VForVadge.com is currently at 10,976 views and counting! My little fledgling has turned into a full-blown sexual health and wellness site, just like I hoped for. I am pretty sure my readers are to blame for this - you guys are awesome. On January 1, I'll be revealing my celebration giveaways - stay tuned! 

2. School's Almost Done!! 

They tried to sneak me with the electives - but I see the light at the tunnel - 2013 means graduation for Kimi! Yes, I'll be going on to grad school at last, but  this progress makes me so happy. I'm taking one semester off to pursue my business ventures - but then it's back at it! 



3. Moving!! 

Undisclosed locations, lol :) 

4. LeVadge Shop is Up and Running

My online store has been doing well, and I'm adding new products for 2013. Be sure to check it out, we've got sales running until January 1. Then the new products hit the "shelf." I can't wait for you guys to see what's up! 
http://shopvforvadge.com 

5. Chris Wynter Music!! 

I am proud to say that I've been working closely with this dope artist - which you've seen featured on my blog before. Mr. Wynter's got some real fire coming out this year, and it's an honor to say I have a hand in this. I'm currently building his website and assisting in the promotional process. We've got a great talent coming up in Hip Hop. Keep your eye out for ChrisWynterMusic.com! 

So, as you can see my plate has been super full. I've got so many pics and thoughts to share with you guys - I can't even keep them all in my brain. Expect a lot of posts, as soon as the cable guy comes to hook up my internet. Love you guys lots! 

The Face Behind Le Vadge...

I mentioned a few weeks ago that I started a new website. It's not a blog at all - it's a full blown site for sexual health and education. People laughed at the idea of me starting the site, but clearly I found my niche; because we've already gotten over 1,900 views in the first two months! I am proud of my brainchild, and I can't wait to see what else can come of it. 

So, you may ask - what is the Vadge? Many, many years ago CousinJin, CousinJan and the rest of the Vadge crew decided to substitute the word Vagina with a much shorter version. It was easier to say around our parents as well as younger siblings - and we could get away with saying a lot of perverted stuff in public. When I was coming up with the name for my site - nothing else would do. 

What is the site about? It's an open forum for anyone (regardless of age, gender or sexual preference) to ask important, urgent - or even random questions about sex. All the things you've wanted to ask but were afraid to. "Straightforward answers to awkward questions" is the motto. So far, we've helped dozens of people get their answers, while including important facts from credible sources. Everything is cited, so you can research it for yourself - but I've done all the work for you. 

So many people (including my own gynecologist) asked me what made me decide to start the site. Growing up in Mount Vernon (NY), we always heard the statistics; second highest AIDS rate in Westchester County. That is startling! I've known kids whose parents had AIDS/HIV - I knew a young lady who passed away from being born with the disease. It was beyond her control to have it, but what about the kids who contract it from irresponsible sexual activity? What about the girls who are afraid to tell their moms about sexual activity, so they secretly carry symptoms of STD's with them indefinitely? They deserve to be educated on what they're doing, so they can pass that knowledge on to others. So kids can stop the reckless behavior and learn the importance of protection. I can't imagine being a doctor diagnosing a teenager with AIDS - imagine the devastation! 

It's not only awkward questions, we give fun facts as well as product reviews of sexual health and pleasure products. I'm working with Sir Richard's condoms, and I'm in the starting phases of doing reviews for California Exotic Novelties! Talk about the busiest unemployed woman you've ever met, lol

So stay tuned, and tell a friend about the site - if you try it, I promise you'll love it ;) 

http://vforvadge.com 

Girl Code - What NOT to Do After a Breakup...

I'm taking a much needed 15minute break from my studying and I figured I'd use it for good instead of evil. As us young people know, "Cuffing Season" starts this month, and there will be a lot of breakups and make ups going on within this time. For those who live under a social rock, "(hand)Cuffing Season" is the time after summer where people prepare for the winter cold by selecting a dating partner to keep them warm. This often means fall-winter hookups that end when spring and summer begin - but they often lead into actual relationships. 

Within this time, there will be a lot of breakups. Boyfriends may see other females that catch their eye, girlfriends may see guys with more to offer than just hard dick and bubble gum. Sometimes, we're just plain old tired of the person we're dating. It happens. What I tend to see during Cuffing Season are tons of bitter women (guys too) sulking and pouting, stomping around making senseless noise. Here are a few rules to live by:



1. DO NOT run to Facebook and air out your relationship. 
       This usually backfires. I am so tired of seeing people (tagged and untagged) being put out with the laundry; all their personal business on display for intentional public humiliation. Not only is this extremely spiteful, it's really lame. If you can't talk about it in private - please don't talk about it on the internet. 

2. On the Rebound? Be Tactful.  
      There's nothing wrong with changing your Facebook status to "Single,"nothing wrong with posting pics of you and the girls on Ladies' Night looking fab. Where the line gets blurred is the females who start posting slutty pics and raunchy status posts to gain attention. Are you really going to find someone that respects you by doing all that? You end up looking desperate, and attracting all kind of internet creeps who'll pretend to like you just to get your coo cat. Save the pics for private use. 

Now is not the time to live out your "ratchet," tasteless fantasies in the club. Don't start making out with strangers, dry humping on the dance floor or getting pissy wasted so your homegirls have to drag you home. 

Casual sex with every guy you've ever liked is NEVER a good idea. Think about your reputation and your health. Last thing you want is a HOE title at the end of your name. 

3. Subliminals. Stop it. 
      Sending jabs to your ex on the sly is just wrong (see Rule #1). Especially if the people in your social network know who he/she is. There's nothing wrong with a song dedication or two, but when you're writing lovelorn crybaby posts all day - people are going to take you off their news feed. 

4. Take Time to Utilize Your Friends
   This is the reason you never abandon your homeys for a significant other. If it doesn't work out, you've always got your friends to vent to. Take a few days to go out with them, have fun living the single life. It may be hard at first, but if you've got other single friends there's plenty out there to do. Hell, if all your friends are taken, they've gotta have some single friends! 

5. Get to Know Yourself!
     Here is prime time to get familiar with who you are. Relationships often take our personalities and mold them with the personality of whoever we're with at the time. Especially if your relationship lasted for a year or more - there are certain routines and behaviors you've adapted. Time to get rid of those things and get back to yourself. Remember what makes you laugh, cry and annoyed. Build your confidence back up before you jump back out into the dating world. You owe it to yourself and the new person you may meet along the way. 

Last but not least:
6. Leave the Baggage at the Airport
    The Golden Rule of Dating is to never bring your pain from an old relationship into your new one. This breeds resentment towards your new partner, which is unfair for him/her. During your time alone, you're more than welcome to weed out the minor details that you could have changed. 

Did you contribute enough to groceries? Did you get a little lazy? Were you a nag? Chronic complainer? Things like that can be helpful to a new relationship, but major issues like cheating, death, abuse, family dislikes can seriously hinder you from finding something great. Just because your mother didn't like your last boyfriend doesn't mean this one shouldn't be introduced to her. Maybe she just knew he was a jerk. And since your ex girlfriend cheated with your whole basketball team - that doesn't mean the new girlfriend will. For all you know, this young lady may have been waiting for a man who would respect her body as well as her mind. Never ASSume. 

Coming from a chick who's been in that single rut before - I can spot a bitter woman or a hurt man from a mile away. Not too many people are trying to adopt the wounded animal from the shelter. Nothing wrong with a dog who limps, though - that's a sign of strength and endurance. Take what you've learned from your past and build a better future, don't wallow in your wounds. 

Take my rules and run with them - I promise you'll have a very productive Cuff Season! God speed my lovelies! 

Leaps of Faith...

The past few months have been crazy for me; leaving my job, starting my first legitimate website, school, studying for my new job. I've been so excited and afraid of what's to come. Of course, the curiosity in me always beats out the fear; I was the kid crying during the scary movie while peeking through parted fingers. Sometimes we've just gotta do it, and I've been pretty glad with the results. Life gets more interesting by the day.

I'll tell you the one thing I can't complain about is my love life. That's something I haven't been able to say for quite some time. It's nice to find someone on the same wavelength, who wants the same goals, who isn't full of sneak tactics and ulterior motives. I smile every day, just thinking about what I've experienced in dating and men in general. Luckily I didn't become bitter and jaded from it all, I was able to open up my chest plate one more time and let a little love fly out. So far, he hasn't steered me wrong. The key element it seems is always going to be communication. If you don't say what you want from day one, there's always wiggle room for foolishness. Not this time - nope. 

I'm a bit nervous about this new job thing, but I am very optimistic. The pay's better, I get to dress up for work every day - and weekends off!! Lord knows I haven't had that in years - pretty much ever. It's going to be a big help with everything I've got planned. Not to mention I'm falling deeper and deeper back in love with music - definitely gonna need some studio time. 

My new website!! It's doing better than I ever imagined, and I've got all my readers to thank for it. Hopefully soon we'll start hosting relevant advertisements so we can reach more people, but I couldn't be happier about how it's growing. A little over a month, and I've got 1300 views - with comments to boot! So much is coming up in regards to the site, I don't even know where to begin. Keep your eyes out for the big-haired, big glasses, big bootied perv at a college campus near you - that's all I'm gonna say :) 

With the downs come the ups, and I swear they keep me balanced. All the trials I go through build my character, and I'm getting stronger and stronger each day. I'm just so blessed to have great support systems behind me - there's really nothing I can't do at this point. Only God knows what the next adventure will bring.

Stay tuned... 

Sex, Love and Pain

Zune Says - Drake - Best I Ever Had

Feeling like I need to get off this sexual high-horse with a little ranting...

Not too many people know I lost my virginity at 12 years-old. It was one of the worst experiences of my life. I'll spare the details, but I will admit that it shaped who I am, sexually and emotionally. Traumatizing experiences often leave us with certain stigmas, and to this day - I think I'm somewhat affected by what happened to me that day.

My question today is - how does sex (or the lack, thereof) affect us? Does it crowd your mind, or is it just an afterthought? Does it start your day - or does it end a lonely night? Do you even know what it is? |smile| To me, sex is art. It's beautiful when done correctly (and in incorrectly). The awkwardness of sex is sexy. Whether it's planned or impromptu, there's always some way to make it an experience. It took me a while to realize that, though. After my first time, I went through a phase where I wouldn't even look at guys. Don't get it twisted, I didn't look at girls, either - but I lost interest in everything males had to offer. It ruined my character, because I went from the bubbly girl who'd talk to anyone - to the passive chick who was always in the cut. I didn't have sex again for two years after that - and the second time was laughable at best - I still chuckle when I see him in my hood. Through that, I realized that sex isn't all people crack it up to be. All the fast girls glamorized it for nothing - right?

Well, not exactly - but it's not the Holy Grail. We don't need it to survive. I was afraid to be sexual when I was younger, because I didn't understand what it was, really. All I knew was something about a penis and a vagina, throw in some friction and screaming. Now as I get older, I've learned that there is so much that goes into having sex, and making love, and just plain ol' freakin. Cuz there's a strong difference.

There's always an emotional aspect to it, regardless of what people may say or think. Even simple jumpoffs spark some sort of emotional interest. I've never done a one-night stand thing, so I can't speak for the people who have. In that case, there's no opportunity for feelings. That's running off straight hormones and raw energy. I've evolved to the point where I now know sex can be used for a number of things -
Sleep aid (raise my hand)
Stress relief (here I am again)
Excercise (why not?)
Financial gain
Social status

Sometimes, what starts as simple sex flourishes into something more, and the benefit of that is - you already know what your partner likes. You get to skip the formalities and move straight into the relationship side of things. Other times, you end up with one of those - "I'm only calling so I can beat" type deals. If it's mutual, cool - if not - prepare for heartbreak. This typically happens to females, I probably know like one dude who was actually hurt by such an agreement.

We actually still have people who have never had sex. It's hard to believe, yes - but it's even harder to do nowadays. Everyone's out hunchin something, or someone - how do you manage to keep it in your pants? I was celibate for the whole 2007, so I know how hard it can be. Especially if you have a love interest - it's like being one dollar away from buying those Prada shoes you've been eyeing. Spend the dollar and have an empty wallet - but spend the dollar and have some fly ass shoes to show for it. Or, spend the dollar and be disappointed that the shoes weren't as great as they were in the window. I always reccomend saving your money. Sometimes, when we rush into things - we get more (or less) than we bargained for. Why trade in your virginity for something that may not be worth it? It's your one-time pass, you can't get it back after it's gone. I respect all the people I know who have managed to save themselves up to this far - and that's about a handful. I know how hard it is not to give in, cuz sometimes you're sitting there thinking - why am I not naked right now? Lol - when the opportunity presents itself in the right situation - you'll know. Take my word for it - you are saving yourself a great deal of stress without it. And building up your upper body strength with all that whacking off.

But - when you get that good "payowww" - you'll finally see what all the fuss is about.